IN A WOMAN’S BAG

Popped into this mart to get some snacks and drinks for a long ride home when the unthinkable happened!! My debit card meant to be in my wallet was nowhere to be found……so I started rummaging through my bag! You know that experience right? With the long cue of impatient customers waiting, I was sweaty, anxious and embarrassed

then out of curiosity, the guy next to me whispered into my ears……………

WETIN UNA DEY CARRY FOR BAG SEF??? Why the stress…. ???

He sure did not stop there, he questioned some of the things I pulled out of my bag even after I found my card…..

There are many great mysteries of the world like; what is the meaning of life? What else is out there in the universe? And, of course, what’s in a woman’s handbag? An object of mystery and a well-guarded secret, all men are fully aware that a woman’s handbag is sacred and to be entered at their own peril……

Ironically, the term ‘handbag’ was originally coined for the leather bags carried by men at the turn of the 20th century.

It wasn’t until the 1920s that the term came to its rightful place and became the handbag women know and love today. The handbag was designed for the 1920’s woman because she needed something to carry her possessions in. In those days, dresses were skimpier and pocket-free and women had growing independence which meant they began travelling without men or servants to carry their things

Ever since, handbags have been a fashion staple and go hand-in-hand, or shoulder-to-shoulder with the continually changing trends and fashions. With a plethora of designs, materials and sizes available, most women have a handbag to suit almost every occasion. Not only does a handbag serve as a gal’s most basic fashion beacon, it also corrals her necessities in life — her wallet, her keys, her cell phone — into one precious bundle. Without it, we are lost.

With the average bag weighing 5lbs – that’s the equivalent of carrying around 5 bags of sugar – chiropractors warn that heavy bags cause back pain and can even lead to painful injuries. The recent trend for the over-sized bags hasn’t helped this concern. The must-have tote allows women to cram even more into their handbags; essentially carrying their life on their shoulders.
But what really is inside? Well, guaranteed finds are: a bulging purse, complete with bank cards, credit cards, business cards and receipts as well as money; a mobile phone and keys. These are simply the basics, the foundations of a woman’s mini-home with straps.

Most women feel completely lost without other essential items that, if left at home, can induce panic! For example, iPods – to cheer one up, calm one down, or just to pass the time with; a novel to make a long commute more pleasant; an electronic notebook and a handful of pens to jot things down such as to-do and shopping lists; an emergency beauty kit which includes: a make-up bag with lip-gloss and other touch-up essentials; mini deodorant and/or perfume; a toothbrush and toothpaste; a hairbrush; and even battery-powered mini hair straighteners for that unexpected work meeting, or spontaneous after-work dinner invitation.
Other ‘useful’ items sometimes found in the depths of a woman’s beloved abyss can include a compact umbrella; sunglasses; feminine hygiene products; painkillers; tissues; hand cream; a bottle of water; and sometimes even a laptop! The list is endless, and that’s before you talk to mothers of small children, at which point the list becomes even more extensive, if not wonderfully weird!

Men frequently ask why women carry around so much stuff.
Some say it’s for security reasons – knowing their most treasured things are with them at all times. Some believe it’s their innate ability to be super-organized – that they are prepared for any situation. Some even say the content of a woman’s handbag is a reflection of their personality but I say that’s the way God fashioned us to be even though some of us are so bizarre. Do you know 60% of items filled in our bags are everyday use while 40% are ‘just in case’ items?

Mine is always stupidly heavy and I often wonder why, yet when I look in my handbag I can see why – my handbag has so much in it, it’s truly ridiculous!

I usually have at least ten pens in my handbag – I’m not sure what I will need them for but they are there, I suppose if I ever need to get a petition signed or receipt for my AFS -sassy – bag customers like you ….. I have plenty of pens available for everyone to sign their names.
I have a hair brush, as always required for that windy day or a bad hair day and this hair brush always has 3-4 bunches on the handle (just in case I decide to put my hair in four pony tails?!?!?!), I have my bible, cheque books, LOTS of receipts from times gone by and (randomly) – someone taught me to keep receipts at-least 24hours after patronizing an eatery just in case hehehehe ….. That will be gist for another day-.
Back to the present lol, I also have at least two books, face wipes, body spray, Ms RT tablet, Phones, HP-mouse sometimes a bottle of water, biscuits, nasal ointment (locally called ‘rubb’ 
Most girls have make-up in their handbags, but I don’t tend to wear make-up very often so this is not something you will find but I have 4 hand creams -yet I always seem to pick out the same one every time I need to use a cream. On top of this I have two hand-creams on my desk at work…..and my body isn’t even dry!

Then again mine is better compared to a ‘cute’ colleague of mine…… she will kill me today……..this lady has everything you can ever imagine in her bag, we call her ‘mobile mall’……in addition to the regular items supposedly found in a woman’s bag you get to see needle and thread, scissors, blade, a cute basket full of expensive painkillers, hair spray, hair strengthener , spare ear/neck accessories, Lint remover, body oil,body cream, MAC powder, blotter, hand sanitizer, some body spray. When I say ‘some’ body spray, I actually mean ten body sprays in her hand bag!!!

The same can be said for lip balms, of which she currently have quite a number some are tins, some are sticks and some are plastic pots –As well as this….she has eyebrow tweezers (more for splinters than eyebrows but the boys at work borrowed them to get something out of a computer the other day), 4 spare plastic bags (not sure what she does with them), a pack of dental floss and sticky tape and of course her fancy designers glasses and the case!
What do you have in your handbag – is it as ridiculously full as my dear Funmike O… aka ‘Rejorejo’………lol ?

More importantly – Ladies , do you think I am missing anything ?

Whatever the reason, one thing is sure…A woman’s handbag is an integral part of her life and something she absolutely cannot leave home without.