GRIEF WEARS MANY FACES……………………..what my mum’s death taught me about GRIEF

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If I told the story of her death, I might understand it better or make sense of it—perhaps even change it. What had happened still seemed implausible. A person was present your entire life, and then one day she disappeared and never came back. It resisted belief. She took ill, fought through it all and got better! Just few days to be discharged and certified okay by the doctor…………. It all happened!!

Her death nonetheless seemed like the wrong outcome—an instance that could have gone differently, a story that could have unfolded otherwise. If I could find the right turning point in the narrative, then maybe, like Orpheus, I could bring the one I sought back from the dead.
My mother died on 4th day of April, a day after Good Friday, at the hospital, around seven in the morning. I was just back from RCCG Holy Ghost service to renew my covenant with God to heal my mum. All through the night I prayed and cried to God to heal her completely and allow her fulfil her promise to see and carry my children with no clue that God had plans to take her the next day

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I got back, so tired and I fell into a deep sleep – planning to call to know how she was doing as soon as I wake up…still no hunch! Then something happened that took my attention away until I got to the salon. My dad called and he wanted to know if I was driving. And even though I convinced him I wasn’t, he insisted I called back once am home. It still didn’t click!! Few seconds later, my naughty younger sister called and without holding back she gave it to me; “my mum is dead”! Just that and she was off the phone!!

I tried endlessly to reconnect her to no avail! Nobody back home seem to pick their calls! Then I called my mum’s line…My brother answered:

Me: Hello, Obi please can I speak with mum

Obinna: She is sleeping (He was unusually calm)

Me: Sleeping?? (I started screaming) what’s going on? Please don’t do this

Obinna: (After a moment, the pain overwhelmed him, he gave in and started sobbing)… mummy is gone!

Then I lost it…………..can’t remember the rest.

In the weeks afterward, I felt an intense desire to write down the story of her death, to tell it over and over to friends. I jotted down stray thoughts and memories in the middle of the night. Even during the last week I spent with her, I found myself squirreling away her words, all her distinctive expressions: “Chineme, be steadfast in prayer” and “I am healed, I am ok”

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I slept beside her, as I had done as a small child. I grew hungry for more of her. I woke up in the nights and listened to her breathing, as the space between her breaths grew longer and longer. Her eyes were wide open begging for sleep. I could see she wanted to confide in me, I could see she wanted to say more – but the words weren’t coming. She looked at me intensely … This continued till mornings yet sleep refused to come. In all of this, the thought of death never occurred to me, I was hopeful.

Yes, I know that I am one of the lucky ones. I also know that this may sound melodramatic but nothing prepared me for her loss. A mother, after all, is your entry into the world. Waking up without her is like waking up in a world without sky: unimaginable. All of a sudden I just realized I’m an adult, no more mum this, mum that…. Am all alone when I’m spiritually and emotionally down.

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She was 69. My mum lived a selfless and virtuous life; so easy to forgive, so peaceful, so kind, so prayerful; our Prayer warrior – she can fast/pray for just about anybody – just mention your prayer point! I remember a day I overheard someone obviously maltreating her. I rushed out to unleash my verbal venom and surprisingly my mum sternly asked me to let go! I was so upset with her – and they even both became very good friends afterwards! Funny enough, the said woman came running immediately she heard about her death and she was uncontrollable. But knowing all this didn’t make losing her any easier.

In the months that followed my mother’s death, I managed to look like a normal person but I was not okay. I was in grief. Nothing seemed important. Daily tasks were exhausting, dishes piled up in the sink, dirty clothes piled, tears flowed like a river. Restless and heavily sad, I walked around the quiet streets where I lived, and all of a sudden I only see mothers with their children- what a coincidence! Suddenly, the words of a friend whom my mum shopped at her place hit me; “Babes I like the way you allow your mum come shopping here, let her have all she wants because you will never appreciate the gift of having your mum alive till she is gone – just like mine. Trust me.” women-tears

There was at least one night when I lay in bed begging for my mum to show up and talk to me. I cried and cried till tears were no more —though I was exhausted, I had a hard time sleeping and after several fruitless, insomniac nights I gave up trying. I desperately wanted someone to save me with an all-consuming love, as in a movie.
Throughout this time, I experienced an acute nostalgia, a longing for a lost time that was so intense I thought it might split me in two, like a tree hit by lightning. I was flooded by memories — a submersion that threatened to overwhelm me, water coming up around my branches, rising higher. I yearned for the sound of her voice saying my name, telling me to ‘lighten up, Ada mmadu it is well!.

I started blaming myself for things I couldn’t do for her; time I didn’t spend with her; all I could have done to save her.

My admiration of my dear mum came later in life. While growing up, she was so demanding of me and sometimes I thought she was hardest on me because I was the oldest daughter – and the naughty one too! Each time I misbehaved she came fully on me with her cane and chili pepper…who knows how stubborn I could have been today??? hki Yet she was able to see into my head and lightened its occasional darkness. Whenever I inwardly berated myself about some failing, my mother was the one who knew best how to pull me out of my self-assault. Often, she was the only one who noticed. To this day, when I am struggling with a difficult task, I pace through my room thinking I need something. And then I realize what I needed: my mother! She had, as my father put it, a clear compass.

People kept saying: ‘It gets better after months or a year.’ And it did in one sense: I could go on for hours without thinking too much about the fact that someone I still loved so dearly was dead. But to expect grief to ‘heal’ is to imagine it is possible to stop loving – to reconcile yourself to the fact the loved one is gone. Living with grief, I came to think, is like being a tree confronted with an obstacle. You have to grow around it; your path is shaped by it.
I still think about my mother every day, but on most days the grief is lighter, less oppressive. With my mother’s death, it appears the person who brought me into the world left closing the door behind her . Who else contained me, felt me kick, and nursed me? She crosses my mind like an exotic bird flying past the edge of your eye: startling, luminous, lovely, gone!

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More often than not, I thought: ‘My mother is dead, and I want her back.’ A mother is a story with no beginning and no end; that is what defines her. What are you to do when the story ends?

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But I’m grateful for the valuable lessons she taught me, even in death:

• Allow your loved ones to grieve in their own ways. Family members will process grief differently, depending on their personalities and adaptive skills. Respect the differences.
For instance, my kid brother never said a word to anyone during this grief-stricken moment till the day came to lay mama to rest. As my mum was being carried into her casket, unexpectedly, he jumped in to carry her, I saw my brother wail so helplessly! That scene will forever remain a part of me.

• Ignore the need to be “strong.” Tears are a gift, and they often demonstrate how precious our loved one was to us.

I have seen my father cry only twice in my life – once when I was very ill and then when his wife died! At first he tried to “be strong”, for us I guess, but loosing someone you shared one bed with for over 40 years is not a joke.

• Don’t be afraid to laugh. Remember the good times and share them with one another.

• Forgive where forgiveness is needed. Don’t allow the grave to rob you of the opportunity for precious reconciliation.

• As much as possible, make your loved one’s passing a time of honor and remembrance that focuses on their life, legacy and dreams.

Keep resting mummy till we meet to part NO more!!

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IN A WOMAN’S BAG

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Popped into this mart to get some snacks and drinks for a long ride home when the unthinkable happened!! My debit card meant to be in my wallet was nowhere to be found……so I started rummaging through my bag! You know that experience right? With the long cue of impatient customers waiting, I was sweaty, anxious and embarrassed oh my gosh

then out of curiosity, the guy next to me whispered into my ears……………

WETIN UNA DEY CARRY FOR BAG SEF??? Why the stress…. ???

He sure did not stop there, he questioned some of the things I pulled out of my bag even after I found my card…..

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There are many great mysteries of the world like; what is the meaning of life? What else is out there in the universe? And, of course, what’s in a woman’s handbag? An object of mystery and a well-guarded secret, all men are fully aware that a woman’s handbag is sacred and to be entered at their own peril……

Ironically, the term ‘handbag’ was originally coined for the leather bags carried by men at the turn of the 20th century. thCASZOJXQ

It wasn’t until the 1920s that the term came to its rightful place and became the handbag women know and love today. The handbag was designed for the 1920’s woman because she needed something to carry her possessions in. In those days, dresses were skimpier and pocket-free and women had growing independence which meant they began travelling without men or servants to carry their things

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Ever since, handbags have been a fashion staple and go hand-in-hand, or shoulder-to-shoulder with the continually changing trends and fashions. With a plethora of designs, materials and sizes available, most women have a handbag to suit almost every occasion. Not only does a handbag serve as a gal’s most basic fashion beacon, it also corrals her necessities in life — her wallet, her keys, her cell phone — into one precious bundle. Without it, we are lost.

With the average bag weighing 5lbs – that’s the equivalent of carrying around 5 bags of sugar – chiropractors warn that heavy bags cause back pain and can even lead to painful injuries. The recent trend for the over-sized bags hasn’t helped this concern. The must-have tote allows women to cram even more into their handbags; essentially carrying their life on their shoulders.
But what really is inside? Well, guaranteed finds are: a bulging purse, complete with bank cards, credit cards, business cards and receipts as well as money; a mobile phone and keys. These are simply the basics, the foundations of a woman’s mini-home with straps.

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Most women feel completely lost without other essential items that, if left at home, can induce panic! For example, iPods – to cheer one up, calm one down, or just to pass the time with; a novel to make a long commute more pleasant; an electronic notebook and a handful of pens to jot things down such as to-do and shopping lists; an emergency beauty kit which includes: a make-up bag with lip-gloss and other touch-up essentials; mini deodorant and/or perfume; a toothbrush and toothpaste; a hairbrush; and even battery-powered mini hair straighteners for that unexpected work meeting, or spontaneous after-work dinner invitation.
Other ‘useful’ items sometimes found in the depths of a woman’s beloved abyss can include a compact umbrella; sunglasses; feminine hygiene products; painkillers; tissues; hand cream; a bottle of water; and sometimes even a laptop! The list is endless, and that’s before you talk to mothers of small children, at which point the list becomes even more extensive, if not wonderfully weird!

Men frequently ask why women carry around so much stuff. 2000px-Face-surprise
Some say it’s for security reasons – knowing their most treasured things are with them at all times. Some believe it’s their innate ability to be super-organized – that they are prepared for any situation. Some even say the content of a woman’s handbag is a reflection of their personality but I say that’s the way God fashioned us to be even though some of us are so bizarre. Do you know 60% of items filled in our bags are everyday use while 40% are ‘just in case’ items?

Mine is always stupidly heavy and I often wonder why, yet when I look in my handbag I can see why – my handbag has so much in it, it’s truly ridiculous!

I usually have at least ten pens in my handbag – I’m not sure what I will need them for but they are there, I suppose if I ever need to get a petition signed or receipt for my AFS -sassy – bag customers like you …..sexy wink I have plenty of pens available for everyone to sign their names.
I have a hair brush, as always required for that windy day or a bad hair day and this hair brush always has 3-4 bunches on the handle (just in case I decide to put my hair in four pony tails?!?!?!), I have my bible, cheque books, LOTS of receipts from times gone by and (randomly) – someone taught me to keep receipts at-least 24hours after patronizing an eatery just in case hehehehe ….. That will be gist for another day-.
Back to the present lol, I also have at least two books, face wipes, body spray, Ms RT tablet, Phones, HP-mouse sometimes a bottle of water, biscuits, nasal ointment (locally called ‘rubb’ hki
Most girls have make-up in their handbags, but I don’t tend to wear make-up very often so this is not something you will find but I have 4 hand creams -yet I always seem to pick out the same one every time I need to use a cream. On top of this I have two hand-creams on my desk at work…..and my body isn’t even dry!

Then again mine is better compared to a ‘cute’ colleague of mine……thCA5Y6HBW she will kill me today……..this lady has everything you can ever imagine in her bag, we call her ‘mobile mall’……in addition to the regular items supposedly found in a woman’s bag you get to see needle and thread, scissors, blade, a cute basket full of expensive painkillers, hair spray, hair strengthener , spare ear/neck accessories, Lint remover, body oil,body cream, MAC powder, blotter, hand sanitizer, some body spray. When I say ‘some’ body spray, I actually mean ten body sprays in her hand bag!!!

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The same can be said for lip balms, of which she currently have quite a number some are tins, some are sticks and some are plastic pots –As well as this….she has eyebrow tweezers (more for splinters than eyebrows but the boys at work borrowed them to get something out of a computer the other day), 4 spare plastic bags (not sure what she does with them), a pack of dental floss and sticky tape and of course her fancy designers glasses and the case!
What do you have in your handbag – is it as ridiculously full as my dear Funmike O… aka ‘Rejorejo’………lol ?

More importantly – Ladies , do you think I am missing anything ?
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Whatever the reason, one thing is sure…A woman’s handbag is an integral part of her life and something she absolutely cannot leave home without.
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More Than Words Can Say…………………….

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Hey  Guys,

We just HIT more than half a million blog views!

I feel  this is such a great milestone for my blog. I blog because I get satisfaction from knowing that a certain number of people read what I write each day. This post statistics helps.  Whether it’s through search engines, blog aggregators, or by clicking on ‘tags’ people who arrive come looking for something.

Thank you so much to every single person who takes time out of their day to come on my blog and read my posts

It means so much more than you will ever know!

I have one clear objective. I want to make a difference in people’s lives and I feel that blogging  could help me there. I know it seems too huge an ambition, and perhaps naïve , but quantity is not everything. Even if an article of mine helps one individual in a small way I feel happy.  And blogging gives me the ability to find out.

I also blog because I can write on a variety of subjects especially based on my past experiences . I know there are blogging ‘rules’ which say one should not…………..  but if I followed them, I would not be me. I have a wide variety of interests and yes, even several passions. I always say  ‘ I can sell ice to an Eskimo’ , I love what I do………….. I make unique and quality bags , I thrive to make Women beautiful …………….. and Men ! Proud of their ‘women’  sexy wink

As a little thank you,  we will be giving a gorgeous  ‘bag’ one of my collections to one lucky winner to add to her collections ,check one of these beauties and see which one fits your style best.

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Rules

1. You must be following my blog .if you aren’t already following you can do so by “clicking” on the ‘like’ and/or  ‘following’ button on the upper side

2. Solve this Puzzle

Below are five phrases that have been tinkered with. When they are read aloud they will sound very similar to the required phrase. What are the phrases? For example “Ducks Sits Hound Fa Mill Ear” = “Does it sound familiar”.

A. my crows off wind dose eggs pea

B. lie fizz lye cab ox soft chalk clicks

C. jest fall oath a yell lobe Rick crowed

D. luck beef four Yule heap

E. wharf rough dud whorls

3.  Leave your name and email .

4. Let us also know which of these 2 bags you would pick if you WON

Winners will be announced November 10th

Good luck guys ……..muah!!!

Should I drive? A debate between my Brain and I

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Some say driving phobia is a phenomenon, often grounded in witnessing or experiencing something traumatic and then developing avoidance to doing anything related to the previous experience.

I have always had a healthy fear of driving even though people maintained I was lazy than scared because I enjoyed being driven around in air-conditioned comfort of a fine car than drive. On the contrary, driving scares the living daylight out of me just by mere listening to a story of how my mum ran into a tree on her first trial …….

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On a lighter mood, someone once said “Learning to drive is easier than learning how to eat Okro soup if you can succeed in keeping your leg from shaking on the throttle………………hmmmm I think it’s the reverse.

Driving and owning a car is what most women will jump at; as for me it wasn’t the case! Before I started driving I used to be so scared of cars and driving. It was so bad that whenever I’m being driven, I would cringe and almost have a heart attack. I wondered how they would navigate at bends and especially in congested traffic. Believe me; I would cling so hard to anything in sight should you drive too close to another road user! Yes, that bad!!

I had a car for 4years and never drove it! Yeah, yeah…call me a coward if you like! I only washed and admired the car then take hours trying to figure out who I can beg or pay to drive me. Riotously, I would call someone from the Mainland to come all the way to drive me to same location and back and then take public bus back to his house. Sometimes, I will prefer to go under the sun with KEKE Napep than drive! lol

I renewed my ‘learners’ permit’ four times, registered with a driving school twice and never completed any. Just the thought of driving creeps up on me for no obvious reason and renders me a quivering wreck at the wheel.

On one of the days I agreed to drive, as I got into the driver’s seat, I totally and completely froze! I have to mention at this point that the instructor assigned to me wasn’t entirely inspiring. In fact, his look, at best, is life threatening! (Okay, I exaggerated but mehn you need to see this guy!). I can still hear him say to me, “there are many things you must remember to do when getting behind the wheels ………. Bla bla bla whew……he ended up confusing me. How on earth can one person be expected to control the steering wheel; use the pedals ABC i.e. Accelerator, Brakes and clutch; not forget the handbrakes; keep an eye on the rear and side mirrors etc and still be expected to enjoy driving??…..One too many!!!

I had some friends teach me. The first was patient and taught me the basic essential skills (Thank God for that); the Second was a bit crass and used to spend some additional time insulting me especially since I refused to go beyond 40mph speed limit on the expressway (now I understand his frustration)! I avoided cars like they were all out for me and coming my way!
One of those days I wanted to prove to my dear “teacher” that I was getting better, so I hit the expressway. For a while I drove just fine. The feeling was extraordinary. I was beginning to enjoy myself but as the road came to a dead end, it was time for me to take my first ‘U-turn’. My teacher asked me to slowly reduce speed by gently applying the brakes, bring the gear to a neutral position and make the U-turn; slowly! Too scared to grasp all the information at once, I ended up doing the exact opposite…to my Teacher’s horror! I forget to change the gear and pressed the accelerator with all my power. All I remember after turning the wheel was that the car took a full circle into a fuel station in front of us. I have never felt so terrified than I did in that brief moment.

Everything happened in a flash. I was so frightened that I didn’t know what to do! At that instant, I either didn’t even remember the car had brakes or completely forgot which of the pedals down there was the brake!  rotfl

Buh God was on my side as I put my feet on the one I taught was the brake pedal and halleluiah!!! The car came to a halt right in front of their diesel pump and then I heard this sharp sound BOOM…..my two rear tyres had busted.

oh my goshThis horrible experience took me back to the scratch! In the interim, I decided to scout for a driver, the first asked for half of my salary while the second maintained he would be taking my car to his place l. I eventually got one after a long search. OMG!! This guy was so unruly on the road and when I cautioned him, he would challenge me like he is reminding me am of no use on the road. On this fateful day, I asked him to come pick me up, not only did he arrive very late, but he came dressed as if he was going for a party. He had the audacity to inform me that he had a party to attend and that we must be back by noon or else he would leave me at the venue. That was the last straw, so I resolved to crack this frustrating and, in my opinion, embarrassing condition I was in.

I’m sure you want to know what I did and how??
I started out having friends in the car with me at least on the highway. My first experience on the express brought physical reactions such as sweating, headache and “jelly” legs then the feeling that the car is unbalanced and that it’ll tip over me as I drive around a corner. I applied brakes at will without considering any car behind me. I only go through longer routes, in order to avoid dreaded busy roads, roundabouts etc.

I drove out on my own to the convenience store down my street then stores in the surrounding area, not more than 10 minutes from home. And gradually I grew in confidence! I started going farther and then to the highway. I’d always make it into something fun, like a shopping trip or going out to eat. Listening to my favorite music also helped a ton to make it enjoyable.
As time went on I got more and more comfortable driving. Ever more I cared less about hooting of horns and shouts from other motorists. My dad would say, pick up some defensive techniques and assume you are the only sane person on the road.

When I pause to consider where I started from and where I am, I still find myself asking; how did I get me here?? It’s amazing and sometimes I still can’t believe I drive the way I do, but I sure believe if I can, then you too can!!! Things happen for a reason. This ‘life experience’ gave me the motivation to face my fears headlong as well as a big dose of encouragement to slowly build up my confidence and become more open to explore. I know every challenge won’t be like ‘driving’, but I definitely have a “trial template” to confront it…boldly!

Cheers!!

Just for a second; before you judge me…. WALK A DAY IN MY SHOES!!!

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Depression is not a choice. It has no external wounds. A plaster will not fix it. An aspirin will not numb the pain. Does that mean you ignore it?

I am a go-getter. I was always looking forward to closing good deals as a Sales Guru yah!!! Up until 5 years ago, I enjoyed a very happy, content and relaxed existence. I had a home, an extremely supportive family, fantastic friends, and an “amazing” boyfriend…Duh

All of this changed first quarter 2011. I was always a confident person. I loved my job and I genuinely looked forward to going into work each day. That February, out of nowhere all because someone made me feel less about myself, I started to over-analyze what I was doing. I questioned my ability to do things I love doing. I lacked confidence in what I was doing. I had Friends that called me up per second just to be sure I was safe and I had not hurt myself!!!2000px-Face-surprise…Moi that so loved my life!

I voiced my fears, but everyone assured me that I was more than capable, and I was told not to worry. These worries, however, manifested inside me, and they multiplied and became even more exaggerated. I started to question other things about myself, and slowly but surely, my whole life came crashing down before my eyes.

The anxiety prevented me from being able to eat. I fought it, but I genuinely gagged on the food. I know now that it was all in my head, but back then it was real. It was terrifying. My mind had taken control of my body.depression . The amount of sleep I was getting diminished day by day. After a couple of weeks, I was lying awake all night long, worrying about every little thing. I was worrying so much I became nauseous. Anxiety filled every cell of my body. The lack of food and sleep meant I had little or no energy. I was embarrassed of how I looked, ashamed of how I was feeling, and because of this, I started to act differently.really
I started to build a defensive shell around me. I began to shut people out, afraid of what they might do or say if they knew what was going on inside my head. I cared less about my dressing, my hair, my shoes, personal hygiene etc. hw i feel. My friends were so worried, they tried to support me, but I wouldn’t let them because someone once made me regret my very existence. I was too ashamed. I steered clear from any social situation that might call for me to have to communicate with other people. I was uncomfortable around others. I felt so different, so alien to everybody else. I snapped at anything.
Decision making became a challenging feat. conf. Simple things, like what to eat, what to wear, where to go, and figuring out answers to questions seemed like a daunting task.

I questioned everything. I was slowly becoming less and less like myself. iphone-confused

It was like an out of body experience-I was looking down at myself from above; seeing myself act like a zombie or ‘Mumu’ or ‘Anuofia’  loland yet having zero control over it. I felt insignificant.

After months of this torture, I knew something needed to happen. And then towards end of 2012, I met someone that changed my life. angel smiley Someone that reminded me that instead of having a devalued, hopeless and helpless feeling that I am nothing and never will be anything, I could have another life; the life that our Heavenly Father gives us; one that is full of love. I mean he counts us so valuable that He gave His only Son to die on the cross so we all, even I who was so unsure of myself, could have that opportunity to live with Him forever.
To him I am so special. He was so supportive and understanding. He got me a life changing book that took my life from the PAST into the Future, the book titled Simple Suggestions for A Sensational Life by PAULA WHITE. awesome Slowly the shell I had built up around me began to crack. Once I started thinking less negatively again, I began to have hope. I came out of my shell; became the SEXY, “HAWT” Dresser I used to be sexy wink…………and God did the rest.

Depression affects a lot more people than you realize. Depression can make you feel lost, alone, afraid and hopeless. There is a fear that no-one will understand you; that you will be ridiculed, dismissed, and denied. These emotions are what fuel depression. It exaggerates and falsifies all that you were once sure of. It causes what I like to term ‘utter catastrophe’ in a person’s life. That is the power that Depression holds.
I had seen and heard of it ruin so many families. Some People have given up on life; some wish that they had never been born, some had gone further by TAKING THEIR LIVE. suicide It is no longer something to be brushed under the carpet before it’s too late………..

Thank God these days, there is a world of knowledge at our fingertips. The fact that so many people have gone through it, means there are so many things in place to help you get out of your hole. The Internet supplies countless websites which offer information and guidance to those who suffer from depression. It is something that is easily accessed, free, and can really make a difference, Whether it be healthy eating, exercise, meditation, mindfulness, art or music therapy-the ideas are endless. Different things work for different people.
More importantly, without God’s direction what we inevitably open for ourselves is a revolving door of trials and unending failures. So do it right the first time by seeking God in your life. Accept only what God says about you because that is the only thing that matters.
I grew past this stage of life, so yes, you too can!!! I have since devoted my time and energy to developing myself from inside out, now when I get discouraged or it looks like I’m moving towards that depressing mood I go to the WORD of God where my strength comes from or I just imagine myself a proud owner of chains of shops all over the world; stocked with my branded Bags, Clothes and Shoes……….and I’m not kidding!!
I share this story to help someone out there; I know a lot of young people will identify with me. I think that if I had heard from someone who had gone through similar stuff and had come out the other end, it would have given me hope and belief.
Even if it’s just one person that gets help from my story, it will be worth it!!!
OK guys I have to go now…………. but remember there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how low you get. God’s ultimate Plan for you is always good. Keep your self esteem rooted in Christ. Find your place in the love of God, and you will find your place in the Hearts of those God put in your life.
KISS KISS Muah!!!
WALK A DAY IN MY SHOES

The sad World of Fake bags in………Naija

13The most fashion related experience that one can have in Naija is the sad world of fake designer bags.
From the Popular streets of Lagos Island to the end of Marina is our famous Balogun Mart amidst shops, half of which are selling Turkish and China goods while the other half is selling just fake designers bags, watches and clothes. The sad world of fake bags is so widespread that you won’t be able to buy a brandless bag, shoes, wallet or a pair of sunglasses.
The witty part here is that FAKE pass fake, they actually have “Genuine Fake” or ‘original Fake’……so catchy LOL
I use to buy Zara and Charles & Keith bags because I love their designs and they inspire me. Their collections always amaze me. It was to the point where I decided to splurge £250 on their new collection just to get membership card. Unfortunately something happened one day and I gave up on this brand LOL. Ok, it’s not that their brand is bad ooh buh wetin I see pass me ….#surprise Look#

…….I no know who send me oh na so I carry myself go Balogun market to get a
Brandless bag I can manage till I get money for “designers” # in Kim K’s voice# LOL that’s how I saw Gucchi / Guccie bag ….which one again sef. I just confuse as I “travelled” from one shop to another like am in a trance…….. And then I started weeping for Zara, LV, Prada, Chanel, D & G and the rest

The question that came naturally was: Who are those people who really buy fake bags? Why do people insist on buying fake knock-offs of designers anything especially bags??? . If you say it’s cheaper well I beg to differ …………. Like seriously, I’d rather have a few well made bags than a closet full of cheap fake ‘bags

But do you really need a fake Chanel? Will it make you look great? What if someone recognizes it as you dey pose like babe LOL ? Isn’t it like telling a lie to yourself? Most of them are even designs that the fashion houses have never
done, so it was funny to find a Gucci Wallet with a calculator included well, trust my ibo bros…..# in Osofia’s voice#

There is a saying: I’m not so rich to buy cheap things. I’ve transformed it into “I’m not so rich to buy cheap bags” I mean why go for cheap bags that have bad quality all in the name of carrying designers bag or grouped as being among #sobbing# but WHY???. In my opinion I could never get any satisfaction knowing that I was toting around a fake bag or fake watch or fake anything. If I can’t afford to buy it, then I’d rather buy something in my price range instead of giving a false impression of what I can’t afford

So while the fake bags spreads into the world, I decided to make a difference. I resolved to salvage this situation so the birth of my baby LOL……our own Bag-line; SASSY by Annie. A brand created to give Ladies opportunity to carry durable and very affordabe bags of good quality . We guarantee all our handbags and purses are made from top class Italian leather and we are not willing to sacrifice our brand quality for quantity.

We cargo your deliverables 4-5days after you place an order online or via bb thus guaranteeing excellent service delivery.

I recommend my readers to go for the real thing …SASSY by Annie. The value for money is great, Save your money, and get a new relationship with our beautifully designed bags ….. #see picture below wink#

Contact:

A. Face book:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Annies-Fashion-STORE/642992122378408

B. bb: 264EB125

HEAD OVER HEELS!!!

WATCH THIS SPACE………………………..Annie’s Fashion Store blog.. Fashion Stories

Annie's Fashion-Store

Even if my passion for shoes doesn’t approach a Celine Dion-level of devotion (500 pairs and counting), Turns out, I’ve always been wired for shoe lust, even when the going gets tough. High heels  literally raises my status because I appear taller, trendy and Exclusive or “well packaged” as a passerby would say…when I wear them ………….lol.”

I can feel your facial expression now! sorry oh!! this is just me Chyneme A.K.A CEO Annie’s Fashion-Store……… but then again, Go ahead and admit it Ladies: shoes are difficult to hate. They flatter even on “fat” days, add zip to even the most boring outfit and instantly boost your sex appeal.

First there was my mum, then there was my best friend Bubu wanting me to  explain the fascinating reasons why footwear is seducing my imaginations — and emptying my wallets — more than ever.

 

“Why do you need so many…

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HEAD OVER HEELS!!!

Even if my passion for shoes doesn’t approach a Celine Dion-level of devotion (500 pairs and counting), Turns out, I’ve always been wired for shoe lust, even when the going gets tough. High heels  literally raises my status because I appear taller, trendy and Exclusive or “well packaged” as a passerby would say…when I wear them ………….lol.”

I can feel your facial expression now! sorry oh!! this is just me Chyneme A.K.A CEO Annie’s Fashion-Store……… but then again, Go ahead and admit it Ladies: shoes are difficult to hate. They flatter even on “fat” days, add zip to even the most boring outfit and instantly boost your sex appeal.

First there was my mum, then there was my best friend Bubu wanting me to  explain the fascinating reasons why footwear is seducing my imaginations — and emptying my wallets — more than ever.

 

“Why do you need so many shoes?,” my friend asks me, as he shakes his head and stares at my closet in disbelief.

I start to answer him and I realize that it’s one of those age old questions that men have been asking women for years. It’s up there with “What’s inside the women’s bathroom?,” “why does it take them so much time to dress up?”, and “Why do women always want to know what men are thinking?” It’s not just my friend, millions of men want to know, “Why do we women need so many shoes? “

The truth is women are in love with shoes. Let me give you the top ten reasons why.

1. Variety – We women simply cannot wear the same shoe every day. We need change. Plus, our shoes need to match our outfits and our outfits need to match our activities and lifestyle. After all, you can’t wear open toe high heel sandals if you are going into a busy market now can you? Plus, variety is the spice of life.

2. Style – We want to look good. No, we want to look hot. No, we want to look comfortable. See what I mean? The bottom line is that we need different styles for different looks.

3. A Good Deal – Women are born shoppers. It is a true talent and no true shopper can turn down a good deal on a pair of shoes. That is why discount shoe stores like Annie’s ShoeHut is so popular. No shoe shopper work her salt can resist a pair of Aldo, JS, Nine West etc marked half-off.

4. Comfort (AKA High Heels vs. Flats) – High heel shoes look great, but let’s face it, they can really hurt the tootsies! Most women I know alternate between high heels and flats or chose comfort shoes for weekends and causal use. You know what that means.. more shoes!

5. Durability – Well made shoes can last a lifetime. This is especially true if you do not wear them every day. As a result of this, your shoes build up in your closet. Kinda like plaque on your teeth.

6. Trendy – Unlike that hot pink leather skirt you partied like it’s 1999 in, the shoes that you may have worn with it are still in fashion. In fact, plastic jelly shoes, curved wedges, booties …..etc  have made a huge comeback. What a feeling!

7. Metamorphosis   – As the years come and go, women’s clothing size will fluctuate. One year you may be a size 4 and then after a few years of stuffing suya and plenty mama- put delicacies down your throat , you may suddenly be a size 14…..*wink*. Also with shoes. Guess what, Your shoe size will not stay the same. Chances are if a woman is a size 8 shoe, she will move to a size 9 somehow. Moreso, when a woman is  pregnant/ after child birth, realize that — her feet may grow a full size more. Hence the need for more shoes!

8. Varieties – “Should I wear my 5 inch Marc Jacobs, JS  heels today, or my 2 inch Gucci loafers or Andrey Brooke Bootie?” It’s a woman’s fundamental right to be able to make a choice on her own footwear. In order to make those choices, women need (you guessed it) many different shoes.

9. Cravings – Like my Pastor PK would say, MEN love TOYS  their collections ranges from Football Jerseys, Power Bikes, Cars, Games etc. We women crave for more and more  and more Shoes in different colours, shades, designs, brands……….etc Enough said.

10. Friendship – If diamonds are a girl’s best friend then shoes are a woman’s best friend. Shoes will always be there for her. They will never shun  or betray their friendship. They will never try to steal her boyfriend or call her fat. They will never let her down. The bottom line is a woman need as many of “these friends” as she can get.

So there you have it. Now please don’t get me started on handbags…….